Fic: Wedding Favours
Title: Wedding Favours
Author:
alisanne
Rating: PG
Pairing: Harry Potter/Severus Snape.
Word Count: 365
Warnings: All dialogue.
A/N: Written for
hogwarts365/
hogwarts365's prompt # 242: “When love is not madness it is not love.”― Pedro Calderón de la Barca, Bottle, Drill
Beta(s):
sevfan and emynn.
Disclaimer: The characters contained herein are not mine. No money is being made from this fiction, which is presented for entertainment purposes only.
~
Wedding Favours
~
“…beloved, we’re gathered here to witness the bonding between—”
“Hurry up, Severus! We’re late!”
“The officiant’s only just started.”
“We’re late enough we’ll have to stand at the back.”
“We can await the end of the ceremony outside if you prefer.”
“We’re here to witness a wedding.”
“You’re here to do that, I’m here because you promised me sexual favours in return for attending this monstrosity with you.”
“Why do you hate weddings?”
“I don’t, I just think they’re ridiculous.”
“Love’s ridiculous.”
“True.”
“Okay, why are you so intent on us remaining outside the chapel?”
“Because I’ve a bottle of whisky in my pocket, and if I’m to survive this event, I’ll need a nip.”
“Severus! You promised!”
“I promised to attend with you, I didn’t promise to remain sober.”
“It was implied!”
“I’m Slytherin, Harry. There’s no such thing as ‘implied’ for us. Well, unless it’s to our advantage.”
“Right. So let me get this straight. You agreed to attend this wedding with me, but you planned to be drunk the entire time?”
“Perhaps not the entire time, but essentially…yes.”
“I can’t believe you! You probably still expect sex, too, don’t you?”
“I’m here, am I not? Of course I expect sex. Although, I’ll understand if you want to attend the reception…first.”
“Damned right! Knowing you, you’d drill me up against the wall before the reception, then bugger off home, leaving me to congratulate Susan and…er—”
“You don’t even know his name?!”
“I do! It’s…er…Thomas?”
“So much for this being the wedding of two close friends from work. Why are we really here, Harry?”
“Ugh, fine! I like seeing you in dress robes, all right? And you never wear them at home, so I’m forced to create stories so you’ll dress up.”
“What? I’m happy to wear formal robes at home.”
“You…are?”
“Quite.”
“Oh.”
“Does this mean we can leave this execrable event?”
“Sure. I’m not that close with Susan. I’ll tell her I stopped by and it was so crowded, I left. Okay, let’s go… Wait, what are you doing?”
“We did attend. These appear to be favours.”
“Severus!”
“What? A gift’s a gift.”
“Godric help me.”
~
Author:
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Rating: PG
Pairing: Harry Potter/Severus Snape.
Word Count: 365
Warnings: All dialogue.
A/N: Written for
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
Beta(s):
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Disclaimer: The characters contained herein are not mine. No money is being made from this fiction, which is presented for entertainment purposes only.
~
Wedding Favours
~
“…beloved, we’re gathered here to witness the bonding between—”
“Hurry up, Severus! We’re late!”
“The officiant’s only just started.”
“We’re late enough we’ll have to stand at the back.”
“We can await the end of the ceremony outside if you prefer.”
“We’re here to witness a wedding.”
“You’re here to do that, I’m here because you promised me sexual favours in return for attending this monstrosity with you.”
“Why do you hate weddings?”
“I don’t, I just think they’re ridiculous.”
“Love’s ridiculous.”
“True.”
“Okay, why are you so intent on us remaining outside the chapel?”
“Because I’ve a bottle of whisky in my pocket, and if I’m to survive this event, I’ll need a nip.”
“Severus! You promised!”
“I promised to attend with you, I didn’t promise to remain sober.”
“It was implied!”
“I’m Slytherin, Harry. There’s no such thing as ‘implied’ for us. Well, unless it’s to our advantage.”
“Right. So let me get this straight. You agreed to attend this wedding with me, but you planned to be drunk the entire time?”
“Perhaps not the entire time, but essentially…yes.”
“I can’t believe you! You probably still expect sex, too, don’t you?”
“I’m here, am I not? Of course I expect sex. Although, I’ll understand if you want to attend the reception…first.”
“Damned right! Knowing you, you’d drill me up against the wall before the reception, then bugger off home, leaving me to congratulate Susan and…er—”
“You don’t even know his name?!”
“I do! It’s…er…Thomas?”
“So much for this being the wedding of two close friends from work. Why are we really here, Harry?”
“Ugh, fine! I like seeing you in dress robes, all right? And you never wear them at home, so I’m forced to create stories so you’ll dress up.”
“What? I’m happy to wear formal robes at home.”
“You…are?”
“Quite.”
“Oh.”
“Does this mean we can leave this execrable event?”
“Sure. I’m not that close with Susan. I’ll tell her I stopped by and it was so crowded, I left. Okay, let’s go… Wait, what are you doing?”
“We did attend. These appear to be favours.”
“Severus!”
“What? A gift’s a gift.”
“Godric help me.”
~
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Thank you! <3
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They are two stubborn men. Although, now they've talked, things should be better. ;)
Thanks, bb!
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Glad I could give you a smile. :)