alisanne: (Snarry_fallen_leaves)
[personal profile] alisanne
Title: Rumour and Innuendo
Author: [personal profile] alisanne
Pairing/Characters: Severus Snape/Harry Potter.
Word Count: 100 x 4
Rating: PG-13
Challenge: Written for [livejournal.com profile] snape100/[insanejournal.com profile] snape100/[community profile] snape100's prompt #673: Snapely Mythbusting - Vampire
Warning(s): None.
Beta(s): [personal profile] sevfan and [personal profile] emynn.
Disclaimer: The characters contained herein are not mine. No money is being made from this fiction, which is presented for entertainment purposes only.


~

Rumour and Innuendo

~

“…wonder what Professor Potter sees in the Headmaster?”

Severus, behind one of the library stacks, froze.

“No idea.” The speaker, likely a first-year from the sound of it, giggled. “I’ve heard the Headmaster’s a vampire.”

Severus rolled his eyes. That rumour again? Would that never die?

“He can’t be! Professor Potter wouldn’t be with a vampire.”

“Why not?” asked someone else, a boy. “Vampires are sexy in Muggle stories.”

“Pfft. Like Muggles know anything about real vampires?”

“Well, to be honest, we don’t either.”

“We will when Professor Potter teaches us about them!”

Severus smirked. That gave him an idea.

~

Harry was laughing when he returned home the following evening. “You should’ve seen their faces when I jumped ahead to discuss vampires.”

Severus smirked. “I can only imagine. Did you entertain them with lurid tales?”

“Oh yes.” Harry grinned. “And just after we discussed all the traits of vampires, I reminded them that the way they’re depicted in Muggle literature is inaccurate, and that they’re basically dead.”

Severus raised an eyebrow. “That’s hardly likely to reassure them about me.”

Harry winked. “I was emphatic about the fact that you’re not dead.”

“Emphatic?”

“Mmhm.”

“Do I want to know?”

“Probably not.”

~

The following day, Severus again encountered students discussing him.

“…can’t be a vampire. We’ve seen him in the sun. And he eats and drinks regular food, we’ve even seen him eat garlic.”

“I suppose.” One student still sounded unsure. “The Headmaster’s so pale, though! And he was a Potions master. He could brew some sort of sunscreen potion.”

“True.”

Severus sighed. Some people just wouldn’t be convinced. He started moving away, freezing when one last student spoke.

“Plus, didn’t you see the smile on Professor Potter’s face when he said they’re masters at sucking? That was from experience!”

Severus groaned.

~

“But you’re great at sucking,” Harry said that night. “You’re one of the best suckers to ever suck—”

“Enough!” Severus suppressed a smile. “Your rating of my oral skills aside, the point remains, the students think I’m a vampire.”

“We could throw an outdoor picnic.”

Severus snorted.

“Go swimming?”

Severus huffed. “They’ll believe what they will. Thanks for trying.”

Harry smirked. “A demonstration of your sucking skills would make a brilliant thank you.”

Severus rolled his eyes. “You’re sure you’re Gryffindor?”

“I’ve had a lot of Slytherin in me recently.”

Despite himself, Severus laughed. “Shall I suck some out?”

“Please!”

~

Date: 2017-01-14 11:55 pm (UTC)
amorettea: (Snape clap)
From: [personal profile] amorettea
YOu have a very silly, very filthy mind. Brava!

Date: 2017-01-15 05:04 pm (UTC)
teryarel: (Default)
From: [personal profile] teryarel
“I’ve had a lot of Slytherin in me recently.” lol! No words, just lol.

(Almost snorted some wine up my nose - honestly, you havve to warn people!)

Thank you! ^^

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