Valensmut Reveal

[alisanne]

The wonderful corvidae9 has posted the reveal at hpvalensmut! I can now tell you all that I wrote All The Difference for ellensmithee.
It's totally out of the norm for me, so do read the warnings.

Also, do check out the wonderful gifts written for me by irana and seshat1.

There are some really wonderful fics and art up there as well, so if you haven't looked, I highly recommend it. /pimpage

Title: All The Difference
Author: alisanne
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 9075
Warnings: Angst, dark themes, non-con, explicit sex, anal, torture, character death (not main pairing).
Pairing: Bill/Fenrir becoming Bill/Remus.
Summary: Bill falls into enemy hands during the war. Can Remus reverse the damage that has been done to him so that Bill can trust and love again?



All The Difference

~

There was a ruddy hue to the rough walls, as if so much blood had been spilled on them that the very stones had begun to radiate a dull red. Bill had had a lot of time to stare at these walls. He’d been here for... He didn’t know how long he’d been here, but it felt like a long time. But what did time mean here, anyway?

He knew he was in a dungeon somewhere. The chains hanging from the ceiling, the stale stench of sour sweat and piss and blood... All his senses told him very clearly where he was.

There were patterns in the red-grey walls, and sometimes when he let his mind wander he imagined he could even see shapes there. Sometimes a flower or a cloud or...

Pain blossomed across his face, and he gasped.

“Pay attention! No checking out yet.”

The growling voice was laced with amusement and lust... Bill shuddered.

“Ah, there you are,” Fenrir purred. “I was beginning to think I’d broken you already, but I’ve not had you that long. You’ve enough wolf blood in you that you should be able to take a little rough play.”

He hated the trickle of blood that flowed down the side of his face, Bill decided. When it dried, it would flake off and itch terribly. His skin was filthy, and he would have given anything for a bath. And, oh yes, for an end to the torture.

“Did you miss me, pet? Are you ready for more games?”

Bill closed his eyes as fetid breath hit him in the face. Fenrir smelt as if he’d been wallowing in a sewer. Perhaps he had.

Another slap, this time across his other cheek, left Bill’s head sagging.

“Keep those eyes open,” Fenrir warned. “I want you to know what’s coming, what I’m about to do, who owns you.”

Bill’s dull eyes followed the whip as it was waved in front of his face.

“I love this whip,” Fenrir said, almost conversationally. “It leaves such lovely bruises. Not that you need more, having already been so deliciously marked as mine.”

Bill fought to remain still as a calloused hand ran down his flank and over his buttock. A finger probed at his hole and a tongue licked the bruised skin of his shoulder.

“Still tight,” Fenrir whispered. “Surprising...”

Bill bit his lip in an attempt to distract himself from what was coming.

There were no windows in this room, just four blood-spattered stone walls and a sturdy wooden door with bars at the very top. Sometimes, Bill thought he could hear distant screams, and he would wonder if he knew any of the people who were crying out for mercy. Mercy they no doubt never got.

He would sometimes forget that he was suspended by chains from the ceiling, so it often came as a shock when the chains would tighten, as they did now, pulling him up until only his toes touched the ground.

“Awake now?” Fenrir cackled.

Bill counted the bars at the top of the door, ignoring the parting of his arse cheeks and the digit being forced inside him...

“I should tell you, I’m used to my children obeying me without question,” Fenrir said in his ear.

Bill stared at the door, beginning his umpteenth count of the pitted grooves that had been gouged into it. That one almost looks like tooth marks...

“... I hate having to make you an example. But I can’t have the others I’ve made thinking their wolf leader is weak.”

The finger was removed, and the high-pitched whistle of leather in flight was all the warning he had before the first blow landed.

Bill closed his eyes and arched his back involuntarily, unable to prevent his whimper as the leather came down solidly, over and over and over, working its cruel pattern into the skin of his already abused back and thighs.

Sometimes he was made to count them, but apparently Fenrir was in a good mood today. That order wasn’t given. Bill hissed when the whip came down over a particularly bruised area.

Only when Bill thought he might actually pass out, when the vision at the edges of his eyes was going grey, did Fenrir stop. Panting harshly, Bill’s head dropped. He knew what was next.

The chains lengthened and Bill sagged, his position allowing Fenrir better access to his body as a finger probed again.

“I shouldn’t allow you lubricant,” Fenrir grunted. “You haven’t earned that yet... But, I’m feeling generous today.”

Rough hands grabbed at his hips to steady him, and Bill sucked in an uneven breath as the sounds of something moist being slapped onto flesh hit him. The sharp tang of his own blood assaulted him for a moment. He was spun roughly and flung against the wall.

“I might have to use your own blood next time if you continue to be stubborn,” Fenrir whispered into his ear, biting it hard.

Bill tried to relax as the blunt head of Fenrir’s cock pushed inside, but it hurt too much. He cried out for the first time that day, and Fenrir chuckled.

A single tear trickled down Bill’s face as Fenrir, without pause, shoved himself all the way in, hard and deep.

Despite the fact that his abused body always seemed to heal fast ever since he’d been bitten, Bill wondered if he was also being healed in between ‘sessions’, now that Fenrir had succeeded in his attempt to break him.

Usually, by the time Fenrir was done, Bill had passed out, and when he came to, he had a few aches, but nothing like the excruciating pain he’d have to endure before losing consciousness.

Otherwise, I should be dead now...

Bill closed his eyes, struggling to control his breathing. Every time he was ra... taken, it felt as if new internal wounds were created, as if it were the first time again. All he could do was breathe through it...

The cool feel of the stone against his face belied how rough they appeared, Bill noted absently. They were actually quite smooth, probably as a result of people having been fucked against them for many centuries, and from the friction having worn the edges away.

A sharp tug on his balls almost brought him back to what was happening to him, but he managed to focus once again, this time on the stone floor. He moved his head slightly to try to see it better.

It seems to have less of a bloody cast to it. I wonder if they wash it more regularly than the walls?

Fenrir sped up, and Bill could tell it would end soon. His own cock and balls were bound, as always, to prevent him getting any pleasure from the proceedings, not that he ever did. Fenrir’s taste for pain made any twinges of pleasure his body might feel disappear. Bill wondered if he was even capable of feeling pleasure again...

Fenrir cried out, stiffening, and as his semen trickled out of Bill’s abused hole and onto the floor, Bill closed his eyes and breathed through it.

“Who am I?” Fenrir asked, nipping his shoulder hard. “Say it.”

Bill swallowed thickly. He hated this part, but he knew what he had to say. “Master.”

“Good boy,” Fenrir whispered. “I’ll have you trained yet, my tight little fuck-toy. One day you’ll believe it. Now, what else can we do today?”

As time wore on, Bill prayed for oblivion.

~

Remus accepted the Firewhisky he was offered, careful to sip it only infrequently. It wouldn’t do to get drunk and lose his ability to Occlude right now. Not while he was in a werewolf enclave.

The other werewolves had left him alone for the most part, and he’d begun to be able to explore the enclave, but he’d been careful not to be seen going too far afield.

His care seemed to be paying off, as he’d been approached earlier in the night and asked if he’d be willing to help guard one of Fenrir’s more recalcitrant prisoners.

He’d accepted the assignment, managing to contain his glee, and so was now waiting to be taken to the place he was to guard.

It had been ten days since the Death Eater raid in Diagon Alley had resulted in the disappearance of Bill Weasley, and while the Ministry twiddled its thumbs, the Order had immediately sent people out looking. Remus was convinced that Bill was being held somewhere in this enclave. He knew Fenrir Greyback would be eager to have his chance at Bill. He only hoped he’d be in time to save him.

No one had seen the incongruity of offering him alcohol before assigning him to guard, and really, security tended to be lax, just because few people knew their location, and because no one could outrun a wolf.

He’d avoided Fenrir, afraid the wily old wolf would be able to smell Remus’ hatred of him, but Remus had been lucky. He hadn’t run into him, and he’d been able to overhear a lot in his last few days there.

He now knew that prisoners had recently been brought in, some had been killed and some had been given to Fenrir to ‘break’. Remus tried hard not to think what that would mean.

He also had heard that Fenrir was the one negotiating with Voldemort, contracting out werewolf services, and he’d even managed to hear about several raids that the Death Eaters had hoped to have werewolf help with. He’d managed to send enough tips back to the Order that some bloodshed had been averted. And, because the werewolves hadn’t been involved in all those raids, he’d not been suspected as the spy.

Now, he needed to see if he could find and rescue any prisoners. He fervently hoped he was in time for Bill...

“Lupin?”

Remus looked up and nodded.

“Come with me.”

Scrambling to his feet, Remus followed the other werewolf out of the main part of the enclave and into the dense woods. They walked for a short while until they came to a clearing in which stood a plain cottage. 

The werewolf rapped sharply on the door. It opened, and they were faced with a suspicious man who had a wand pointed at them before clearly recognizing Remus’ escort. 

“You must be my replacement,” he said, grinning at Remus and putting away his wand. “No matter what, don’t go downstairs, yeah? Trust me, you don’t want to know what happens down there.

“He’ll be back later. When he gets here, clear out. He doesn’t like anyone around while he... plays.” The last was said with a shudder.

Remus blinked and opened his mouth to ask a few more questions, but the two men were already on their way, the door closing quickly behind them.

He looked around, surprised at how large the place appeared inside.

Must be wizarding space.

It was empty, but for a few bare sticks of furniture and a cot in the corner. There was a door off to the side that probably led downstairs.

He took an experimental sniff, and immediately knew he wasn’t going to like what he found down there.

Remus sighed. Guess that’s where I’ll start, then.

~

Bill blinked, his vision clearing after a few moments. He relaxed slightly when he realized that he was alone. His body ached terribly, and he figured he hadn’t been healed this time.

Either that, or my body’s just not recovering anymore.

Bill knew he could take a lot of abuse now that he had some werewolf blood in his system, but he wasn’t sure he would survive too many more sessions with Fenrir. It was undoubtedly a blessing that he’d blacked out towards the end of the last one.

He pulled halfheartedly at the chains, not surprised when they tightened in a mild warning. They were set to constrict painfully if he tugged too hard, and that first night, as he’d fought his captivity, they had crushed his wrists before he’d given up.

He closed his eyes and breathed, remembering how painful that had been. Yes, he had to have been healed since then...

A sound from just outside the door made him look. Was he back? Of course, it could have been days, Bill would have no way of knowing... But no, the magical sponge full of musty water hadn’t appeared yet. He was pretty sure that happened every day. Just enough to keep him going for another day of Fenrir’s idea of play...

The knob turned, and Bill tensed enough that the chains pulled on his arms slightly. He relaxed and they did, too.

When the door finally opened, Bill was as ready as he could be.

~

Remus followed his nose. Most of the makeshift dungeon was not in use at the moment, although all the rooms appeared to have been used at one time or another.

The stairs he’d found just beyond the door hadn’t looked particularly sturdy, but they’d held his weight well enough, and he’d picked his way carefully in the gloom, not wanting to use a spell to light his way, lest he trigger some wards. He adjusted quickly to the darkness. There was just enough light to see and know that it would be a bad idea to touch anything.

There was someone down here. He knew that immediately; the telltale smell of urine and fresh blood was a dead giveaway.

Several doors were on either side of the narrow hallway, and he stopped at each one, listening for breathing or moaning or something. When he finally got to a certain door, he heard the shallow breathing of someone who was in pain.

There were bars at the top of the door, so he looked inside, shocked at how the emaciated the figure was hanging there. The naked man looked familiar, dull, matted red hair making Remus draw a quick breath.

Could it be? Remus pursed his lips and tried the knob, happily surprised when it opened easily under his hand.

Gulping, he stepped into a chamber of horror.

~

A man was there. A man who wasn’t Fenrir, although Bill sensed he was a werewolf. His face looked familiar... Then, Bill remembered. He knew this man. This man knew what it was like to be mauled while young, in fact, he’d been made a wolf while even younger than Bill.

“Remus...?” Bill croaked in disbelief through parched and bleeding lips.

Remus stepped forward, eyes roaming the starved body, naked but for the cruel straps on his genitals. Oh, fuck, it was... “Bill? Gods, is this where you’ve been all this time...? Merlin...”

Seeing Remus reach for him, Bill shook his head to try to warn him, but it was too late. Remus was already there, reaching for the chains.

“No!” Bill whimpered, but it was too weak and too late.

Remus’ strong tugs on the chains made them tighten painfully, and Bill was yanked up so fast it felt as if his arms had been pulled out of their sockets.

Bill screamed, and Remus muttered, “Damn,” as he tried to undo the damage he’d done.

“You... go...” Bill gasped. “He’ll... be... back...”

“I’m not leaving you,” Remus said. “Why d’you think I’m here?”

“Can’t free me...”

“Yes,” Remus said. “I can.”

Pointing his wand at the chains, he intoned, “Liberatio Eximo.”

They contracted painfully for a moment before finally falling away from Bill’s wrists for the first time he could remember in... ages. Bill crumpled, Remus only just managing to catch him.

“Must get out...” Bill began, only to be interrupted by a loud alarm tone.

“Rigged, hm?”

Bill closed his eyes.

Remus looked about, spotting a pile of what looked like rags in the corner. “Were those your clothes?” he asked, pointing.

Bill looked and nodded. “Think so...”

Remus Summoned them, hearing a distant crack just as he did so.

“Time to break my cover I guess,” he said, pulling Bill close. “Let’s go.”

“Can’t Apparate,” Bill muttered. “Tried.”

“We’ll see about that,” Remus said, fingering the special disc in his pocket. This was good a time as any to test the new magic that Snape had developed.

Remus closed his eyes and concentrated, ignoring the sound of heavy, running footsteps. Fixing their Apparation point clearly in his mind, he opened his eyes just in time to see a figure appear at the door. With a smirk, Remus, holding Bill carefully, Disapparated.

Remus swore he heard an enraged howl follow them.

~

Bill screamed, the squeeze of Apparation making his already overtaxed body explode in pain.

Remus heard him and held onto him tightly as they landed with a thump in a clearing of trees.

Looking around in the darkness, Remus took a breath and said, “Okay, that’s the drawback of the Anti-Apparation Dissipation Spell Snape developed. It only gets us so far outside the field. We’re still pretty close, so we have to do a few more jumps to get away. Bill, are you up for it?”

Bill was dry heaving on the ground, but he looked up with bleary eyes and nodded. “Anything,” he whispered. “Just don’t make me... go back.”

Remus swallowed hard, and reaching for his charge, picked him up, cradling him gently to his body. His heart almost broke to see the bruises and the way his genitals had been bound, but he had no time to fix that now.

“I’m going to take you somewhere safe, yeah?” he said as Bill closed his eyes.

A shuddering sigh was his only reply.

Minutes that seemed like hours passed, and Bill bit his lip. He felt as if he were being squeezed more and more with each successive Apparation, but he never complained now that he knew what to expect.

“One more,” Remus murmured, and Bill nodded.

When they landed, Bill opened his eyes and looked around.

They were in a small room, a bed and a chair in one corner, a table and two stools in the other. A small, makeshift kitchen was off to the side, and a door led to what he suspected was the bathroom.

“Not much,” Remus said. “But the Order is not exactly rolling in cash at the moment, nor are we popular with the Ministry.”

Bill nodded. So, things hadn’t changed that much, then. Scrimgeour was still trying to wipe out anyone who wasn’t working directly for the Ministry, and Remus, clearly an agent of the Order and not of the Ministry, was outside their purview.

“I promise I’ll let your parents and siblings know that you’re okay,” Remus said, placing Bill gently on the bed. “But for now, we have to lay low. We’ll probably be hunted by many people.”

“Where are we?”

Remus smiled. “One of the old safe-houses that the Order set up years ago. When Moody was still at the Ministry. He made sure that it’s not on any list anywhere.”

Bill groaned. “Gods... I can hardly believe I’m out of there. You... I...” To his horror, Bill began to choke with emotion, and Remus patted his shoulder awkwardly.

“I need to try to heal you as best I can, Bill,” he said. “These houses are generally stocked with healing potions, but I didn’t know exactly what’s here, so I have to look, all right?”

Bill closed his eyes, exhausted.

Remus laid him back down, and, after casting a few low level Healing Spells, walked into the small kitchen to begin rifling through the cabinets. He found some sealed potion vials, returning with them just in time to see Bill slip into true sleep.

Placing the vials on the table, Remus eyed his new charge carefully.

Bill had never been fat, and he’d lost at least a stone as a result of starvation and dehydration, no doubt. His skin was bruised and badly torn in places where he’d clearly been flayed open, probably by a whip, Remus judged, although some marks could have been made by claws.

His cock and balls were bound cruelly, with just a bare slit in the top to allow for urination.

That’s first to go, Remus decided.

Whispering an Unbinding Spell, he flicked his wrist, and the tight leather bands unwound, leaving bare genitals behind. Remus banished the filthy leather.

He’ll want a bath when he wakes up, and he’ll need to at least drink something with these potions to make them stay down.

Remus busied himself with domestic chores, trying not to wonder how much of the blood they’d left behind on the walls of his cell had been Bill’s.

~

“Well, well. Who do we have here?”

Bill whirled, immediately on the defensive, but it was already too late. The masked figures surrounded them, and his attempt to grab Fleur’s hand and Apparate away was met with derisive laughter.

“Isn’t that sweet?” drawled the same voice, and as Bill watched, an unmasked figure materialized from out of the darkness. “I think they must be in love.”

Bill drew in a deep breath, recognizing that hated face. He snarled.

“The cub has teeth,” one of the masked cowards said, and Fenrir chuckled.

“Of course he does,” the werewolf said, eyeing Bill. “He’s got some of my blood coursing through his veins. Enough for me to claim him, anyway.”

Another masked figure stepped forward. “I claim him.”

The voice was female and cold. Bill shivered.

Fenrir met her gaze. “Would you like to fight for him?” he offered casually, inspecting his filthy, razor-sharp nails. “What say? Hand to hand combat, wizard to wizard?”

Bill got the impression the female outranked Fenrir, yet, he knew who would win. She shrugged.

“You cannot claim both,” she said, turning her head to inspect Fleur. “I’ll have the girl.”

Fenrir waved a hand. “I’ve no interest in the Veela,” he said. “I’ve tasted Veela flesh. There is little novelty there. Go ahead.”

And before Bill could move he was bound, and Fleur, struggling mightily with their captors, was being hustled away in the other direction. She went out of sight and screamed once before falling silent. An Apparation pop sounded a few moments later.

“Fleur...!”

He was backhanded across the face, and his shocked eyes flew to Fenrir’s.

“Forget her,” he said. “She’s already dead, or she’ll wish she was. You’re mine now.”

Bill jolted awake, breathing hard, Fleur’s name on his lips, struggling against the arms that held him fast.

A soothing murmur made him pause, and he turned his head, looking directly into sympathetic amber eyes. A potion vial was held against his mouth, and Bill downed it without hesitation, feeling immediately better.

“Thanks,” he whispered.

“Bad dream?” Remus asked, letting go of Bill as soon as it appeared he was more in control of his faculties.

Bill, still breathing fast, nodded. “I... they... Fleur... Sorry.” He gulped as he tried to regain his composure. “How long was I gone, anyway?”

Remus sat back to give Bill room. “About a ten days,” he said. “You were captured together?”

Bill nodded again. “That’s all? Seems longer...” He took a deep breath. “We were shopping in Diagon Alley, and it was daytime. I thought we would be safe! Who would have imagined they could kidnap us out in the open like that?” His eyes went wide. “I have to find her! Merlin, she’s probably being tortured back at that place...”

Remus shook his head and laid a hand on Bill’s arm. “No, she’s not,” he said, voice gentle.

Bill blinked. “I... Well, I guess you would have known that she wasn’t there, hm? Yeah, that was silly, plus, I think it was some female Death Eater who took her, so I bet she’s wherever You Know Who is...” His voice trailed off as Remus continued staring. “What?” he finally whispered.

Remus leaned forward. “She’s dead, Bill,” he said. “We found her body dumped in the Forbidden Forest a few days after you disappeared. I’m so sorry.”

Bill’s eyes closed, and he sat still for a moment. Finally, he spoke. “May I... I’d like a bath, could you...?”

“I don’t think you’re strong enough to walk there,” Remus said. “I’ll carry you.”

Bill kept his eyes closed as he was gently lifted out of the bed. His entire body was still aching, although he recognized that Remus had given him a strong Pain Potion, and it had taken the edge off.

The bathroom was simple, but it had a large enough tub. It was already filled with clear water, and curls of steam were rising from it.

“I thought this might be your first request,” Remus said. “So I had it waiting. Ready?”

Bill nodded, sighing as his filthy body was lowered in. A tear slipped down his cheek as Remus, without being asked, began soaping and washing him, taking care to avoid the areas with the more livid looking bruises.

“Seems that you got the fast healing, anyway,” Remus said conversationally. “I would have sworn that the skin on your back looked a lot worse when I found you.”

Bill swallowed heavily. “I think I heal pretty fast now,” he said. “I’d wondered if Fen... if he was having me healed in between... Well, I suppose he wasn’t, it was just me.”

Gentle hands never faltered as Remus continued washing him, even untangling his wet hair to scrub it clean.

“I doubt Fenrir did much to try to spare you pain,” Remus said, pouring water over Bill’s head. “Did he give you anything to eat or drink at all?”

Bill nodded and explained how the rag would appear occasionally so he could suck on it.

“Mmm. So, yes, the bare minimum,” Remus said. “The next thing is food, then.”

After refreshing the water for a fourth time, Remus allowed Bill to soak for a few minutes before levitating him out and drying him with a spell. He produced a soft pair of sleep pants and helped Bill don them before carrying him back to the bed.

Bill blinked up at him, already exhausted.

“Here, drink this,” Remus said, pressing a mug to his lips.

Bill sipped slowly, managing to swallow about two-thirds of it before his eyes closed. Remus rescued the cup before it fell out of his hands and spilled onto the bed.

Brushing back the long red hair, Remus sighed. There was going to be hell to pay in the morning when the reality of Fleur’s death hit his charge. The mixture of Calming Draught and Dreamless Sleep he’d given him would only go so far.

Quickly swallowing his own cup of tea and a sandwich, Remus enlarged the bed and lay down next to Bill, hoping for at least a bit of sleep before the emotional storm he knew was coming hit.

~

Bill stretched, his muscles aching, but not unpleasantly. He lay there for a moment with strong arms wrapped around him, feeling warm and safe for the first time in ages. His mind was blank, and for a brief second he could almost imagine he was back home at the Burrow. The sound of someone else’s even breathing reassured him, although he was sure there was a reason he should have been upset...

He stiffened as the memories of the past few days flew into his consciousness. The arms that held him tightened as soon as he tensed up, and he began to fight instinctively.

“Bill, relax, I’ve got you, you’re fine...”

Bill shuddered, but grew calmer, soothed by Remus’ soft voice and gentle touches.

“Fleur’s dead...” he managed to choke out. “And it’s all my fault.”

Remus held him as he shook. “It’s not your fault,” he said. “Those monsters killed her, not you.”

Bill sighed. “If I hadn’t invited her to go to Diagon Alley that day...”

Remus cut him off. “It is not your fault.” He sighed as Bill sniffed. “And you’re entitled to take your fiancée out to lunch, Bill. It was just bad timing, that’s all.”

“She wasn’t,” Bill said, and Remus turned a puzzled face towards Bill’s.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

Bill moved away and Remus let him, watching as Bill scrubbed at his tearstained face.

“We decided to break up,” Bill said so softly that Remus had to lean forward to hear him. “That day, we decided that it wasn’t going to work. We... wanted different things. And now she’s dead. She could have found someone else, gotten married and been happy... If only I had postponed the lunch, or...”

Remus shook his head. “Stop that,” he said firmly. “There is no way that this is your fault. You did not wish this on her or yourself. Your job now is to heal and outlive the bastard so that one day you and I can dance on his grave.”

Bill blinked, then choked. “I... yes, well, I hope to have a hand in placing him in that grave,” he said, voice bleak.

Remus smiled, more a baring of teeth than anything resembling humor. “As do I,” he said.

~

Bill sat back, replete. “For someone who says he can’t cook, you do pretty well,” he said.

Remus smiled self-deprecatingly. “I manage,” he said, spelling he dishes clean and into the sink for a rinse. “Nothing like what you’re used to, I imagine.”

Bill shrugged. “Not so far off from my mum’s cooking,” he said. “She does make more desserts, though.”

“Mmm, if I had something to make dessert with...”

Bill shook his head. “I don’t think I could eat anything more. I think you’re already trying to feed me too much.”

Remus looked him over, and Bill flushed a bit under the frank appraisal. “No, I’m trying to restore a bit of what you lost,” he said, taking in Bill’s too-thin frame. “I’m just glad you can keep down solid food now.”

It had taken a day before Bill had stopped vomiting any solid food he was given, although Remus had managed well enough by plying him with Replenishing Potions, with which it turned out they were well stocked, thanks to Snape’s efforts.

“How’s your back?” Remus asked.

Bill looked down and toyed with the hem of his too large t-shirt. “It’s okay,” he said unconvincingly.

Remus stared at him. “May I look?” he asked softly. “I found some salve that I think might help the scars and bruising.”

Bill nodded. “All right, but it doesn’t matter, really.”

Remus gestured him towards the bed. “Why do you say that?” he asked as he opened the container of salve.

Bill pulled off his shirt and lay down on his stomach. His words were muffled, but Remus could hear him clearly nonetheless. “It’s not as if anyone will be getting too close to me now...”

Smoothing his hands over the deep ridges that the whip and other beatings had left on Bill’s back, Remus fought to stay calm.

“I think you would be surprised,” he finally said. “An attractive young man like you should have no problem getting attention from the ladies. All of them will want to feed you and take care of you at the very least.”

Bill chuckled dryly. “That’s not the same as being interested in my body for more carnal pursuits,” he said. “And, with the werewolf taint...” He paused as if just remembering who he was talking to. “Sorry...”

Remus kept massaging his back, his hands moving slowly and carefully over the still aching and bruised muscles and tendons. “There’s no need to apologize. I must say, though, that, were I interested in women, I would have no problem.”

Bill froze, and Remus prayed that he hadn’t shocked the younger man too much.

“You’re not interested in women?” Bill asked carefully.

“Mmm, no,” Remus replied.

“But Tonks...”

“Was an aberration,” Remus said. “She kept throwing herself at me, and she can morph into anyone... When it became clear to her that I preferred her as a man, well, she finally got the idea. She’s with Kingsley now.”

“I had no idea,” Bill said.

“Is it a problem?”

Remus eyed the cottage. If he had to, he could sleep on the floor in the corner without too much difficulty. He’d been sleeping with Bill in the bed, figuring that he would need comforting and soothing from the inevitable nightmares, and he’d been right on no few occasions.

They had woken up wrapped around each other several times, but Bill hadn’t seemed to mind, after that first day he’d seemed quite comfortable, in fact. Remus had chalked it up to Bill’s having lived with many siblings.

“No, no problem,” Bill said. “I... I wish I’d known before, though.”

Remus pursed his lips and began working the salve deeper into Bill’s skin. “Why’s that?” he asked.

Bill tensed before he replied. “I might have asked for your advice,” he said. “You’d think that with the number of brothers that I have one of them might have been gay, but if they are they never told me.”

Remus paused briefly in surprise before continuing his massage. “It’s not a regular topic of conversation,” he finally said. “What do you want to ask?”

Bill’s shoulders relaxed. “I’d never done anything about it, you understand, but it was becoming clear that I was... looking at... men, well, a man in particular, and that was why Fleur and I knew it wouldn’t work. She noticed that I had a crush, she confronted me, and I confessed. She was a Veela and that made me think I could try with her, but when we did... Anyway, ever since he did what he did I’ve been worried that maybe I’m defective because it hurt so much and I...”

Remus closed his eyes. “Fenrir was your first man?” he whispered, horror settling somewhere in the vicinity of his chest.

Bill nodded, and Remus swallowed the bile that had risen in his throat.

“What he did to you was not only sex, do you understand?” Remus finally was able to say after finding his voice again. “He tortured you. What he did had nothing to do with pleasure and everything to do with power.”

Bill was silent for so long that Remus began to worry. “I know that,” Bill finally said softly. “It’s just... Is that all that it is? Why do people do it, then?”

Remus gave up on the massage and settled over Bill, rolling them both onto their sides then pulling Bill’s back towards Remus’ chest.

“It feels amazing when it’s done right,” he said. “Did you ever kiss Fleur?”

Bill nodded. “Sure. I’ve kissed lots of people.”

“Good. And have you made love to a woman?”

Bill nodded again.

“So you know what it feels like to top. And just as it’s possible for a truly twisted man to do that to an unwilling woman and perhaps gain some pleasure out of it, so, too...”

“I get that,” Bill said. “What I don’t get is why anyone would want to be on the receiving end of something so painful.”

“It’s not painful if it’s done right,” Remus said. “And there is something about pleasing your partner, making him writhe in ecstasy beneath you that is... Well, it’s satisfying. All I’m saying is don’t let what happened taint you from trying the full gamut of experiences available to you. How you feel about the person makes all the difference.”

“You’re right, of course,” Bill said. “I... thanks, Remus.”

“Now that you know, if you’d be more comfortable with my sleeping on the floor...”

Bill shook his head. “I like it when I wake up and you’re there,” he said. “Please stay.”

Remus smiled. “All right.”

Bill turned his head and pressed a soft kiss into Remus’ rough cheek. “Thank you,” he whispered.

Remus closed his eyes. “Bill, this is not a good idea...”

Bill shifted in Remus’ arms, maneuvering around so that he was staring up at the older man. “Who do you think I had a crush on, anyway?” he asked. “I didn’t say anything because, well, Tonks... But, it was you.”

Remus couldn’t resist running a calloused finger over Bill’s face. “You’re so young. You can’t know what...”

Bill made a rude noise. “I can decide to get married but I can’t know that I’m attracted to you?” he asked.

Remus flushed. “It’s not the same.”

Bill reached up and ran his fingers through Remus’ hair. “I know it’s not, and I’m not suggesting we, well, do anything immediately, but, maybe sometime?” He kissed Remus’ lips before pulling back. “That’s all I’m asking. Unless you’re not interested in me...”

“Not interested?” Remus laughed softly, allowing his eyes to roam Bill’s face, and with a deep breath, he bowed to the inevitable. Running a thumb over Bill’s tempting bottom lip, he said, “All right. But if anything makes you uncomfortable, we stop.”

~

Not much made Bill uncomfortable, surprisingly.

Remus discovered that Bill was very tactile, up to a point, although any attention paid to his arse made Bill freeze with fear, and made Remus pull back immediately.

“I’m sorry,” Bill would say, and Remus would smile and shake his head.

“There’s no need to apologize,” he would say, and they would fall asleep in each other’s arms.

Gradually, Bill grew more relaxed, until he was waking Remus up with sensual kisses and energetic frotting. Soon, Remus was spending most of his time smiling and happily, hopelessly aroused.

“When do you think I can safely Floo my parents?” Bill asked a few days later.

Remus looked him over. He seemed a lot more like the vibrant young man he’d been before his kidnapping, yet there was still the shadow of pain in his eyes that held Remus back, made him extra careful with Bill.

“It’s been fifteen days since you disappeared,” Remus said. “I think we should contact them today. We have to drop the wards on this place to do it, which is why I’ve not contemplated doing it before, but I think it’ll be safe if we’re brief.”

Bill nodded, and with a smile, reached over and kissed Remus soundly. He had become more demonstrative as the days had passed, and while Remus was always careful to let him instigate their encounters, that policy was seriously testing his will.

The wolf inside had evidently identified Bill as its mate, and Remus was having a hard time pulling back when they would kiss or touch. Bathing was particularly trying, and it was often all Remus could do not to spread Bill out and lick him from head to toe in a sensual feast.

With a last nibble, Bill pulled back and, grasping Remus’ hand, led him over to their bed.

“Before we do that, I wanted to thank you for all you’ve done for me,” he said, his face smiling and open. “And, you’re driving me crazy.”

Remus let himself be pulled down on top of Bill.

“You don’t have to...”

Bill silenced him with a kiss. “Want you,” he said when they both broke for breath. “I’ve wanted you for a while, and if you weren’t so bloody careful of me you’d realize that...”

Remus stared at him, then nodded slowly. “All right, but slowly.”

And so, slowly was how they moved. Clothing hit the floor as hands searched for and explored scarred skin. And when the time came, Remus, eyes shining, buried his fingers in his own body as he showed Bill how he had prepared himself. Writhing, he guided Bill inside him, moaning his pleasure as he showed Bill how it felt to top.

Bill, in turn, finally managed to exorcize his demons, the clench of Remus’ body around him expelling his memory of Fenrir’s twisted experiments with his body. He gave himself up to happiness, and Remus.

“That was incredible,” Bill said afterwards, his face buried in Remus’ sweaty neck.

Remus smiled. “Mmmm, for me, too.”

“I had no idea,” Bill whispered. “Next time, maybe you’ll show me the other end.”

“Next time?” Remus pressed a kiss to Bill’s shoulder. “We’ll see.”

Bill moved closer. “It’s only fair, don’t you think?”

“This isn’t a race. We’ll do that only when you think you’re ready,” Remus said.

Bill smiled. “I’m holding you to that.”

Minutes later, dressed once again, they stood by the fireplace. Remus drew his wand, and with a whispered spell lowered the wards. Bill felt the tingle as they came down.

Accepting the Floo powder, Bill threw a handful into the fireplace and, after yelling, “The Burrow!” stuck his head in.

Remus sat back in one of the chairs and listened to Bill’s end of the conversation, smiling when he heard voices raised in what sounded like a boisterous welcome.

But then there was a more ominous sound. Bill pulled back so suddenly that he almost fell off his haunches.

He rubbed a hand over his face, unconsciously spreading residual Floo powder on his skin.

“Shite!” he said.

“What is it?” Remus asked.

“That bastard set a trap!”

~

“Tell me again exactly what Molly said,” Remus insisted. He’d forced Bill into a chair and had already fed him a Calming Potion, which was slowly working.

“She said that they were contacted a few days ago by a man who said he was speaking on my behalf. He told her that I had been held prisoner, but that I had escaped and was fine yet in hiding. And he had my wand as proof, which they confirmed was mine. He arranged a meeting between my father and me for today, and he’d only just left before I Flooed.”

Remus growled. “It’s clearly a trap. Did Arthur go alone?”

Bill shook his head. “The twins, Ron and Draco Malfoy went as well. Everyone but Dad was disguised.” Bill looked up at Remus in shock. “Draco Malfoy?” he asked. “What in the hell...?”

Remus smiled. “Some things changed when you were captured, Bill. Ron and Draco had reasons that they were always at odds, it seems. All that passion found a different outlet. Anyway, where did they all go?”

“Mum said they were told to go to Hogsmeade and that they would be given further directions after that. That clock Mum has shows them all as ‘unknown’, although she said she figured the guy’s story was true since my spot on the clock showed ‘safe’ starting about five days ago.”

Remus nodded. “All right. I guess I’ll go and look and you stay here...”

Bill narrowed his eyes. “Not a chance. That bloody fucker has my father and my brothers. And if Ron’s involved with Malfoy, then we have to save him, too.”

“We?”

Bill growled. “Yes, we. I’m going.”

“Fenrir’s likely to be there,” Remus reminded him.

Bill nodded, a fierce look on his face. “Good,” he snarled.

~

It was surprisingly easy to pick up the trail with both of them set on tracking the missing Weasleys. While Bill again consulted with his family, Remus checked in with one of the Order members at the Ministry, only to discover that they were gearing up for a major raid.

A bit of coordination, and an hour later, Bill and Remus found themselves in the woods that surrounded Hogsmeade, following a fairly clear scented path, several Order members ahead of them.

“Not sure what Fenrir has against bathing,” Remus muttered, making Bill crack a smile. “Not that I’m complaining. It does make him easy to find.”

Bill fondled his wand. “I’m just happy that I have my wand back, and that I’m more prepared this time.”

“Are you?” Remus asked softly. “There’s no shame in your going back and waiting for word, you know. And we know this is a trap...”

“I have to do this,” Bill insisted, mouth set. “They’re my family, and I owe it to them and to myself to face that monster and put him down.”

“All right. But if it gets to be too much, just let me know. I have no problem killing him for you.”

Bill smiled. “I know, and thanks.”

The woods were quiet, and as they advanced, Bill began to feel somewhat apprehensive, and his mind began to wander as he tried to distract himself.

“I think it’s good I didn’t know about Ron and Malfoy before,” Bill whispered as they crept closer.

“Why’s that?”

“I don’t think I could have brought myself to go to my baby brother for sex advice.”

Remus smiled. “Good thing you won’t have to, then,” he said. “I’m happy to answer all your questions.”

“I’ll bet you are...” Bill’s voice trailed off as they walked straight into a battle.

“Down!” Remus cried, and then there was no more room for talking.

~

Bill ducked a hex, rolling on the uneven ground and silently giving thanks that his back had healed several days ago. He would have been in severe pain if it hadn’t.

Death Eaters and werewolves engaged Aurors and Order members, and for the moment, the Death Eaters appeared to be outnumbered. Bill managed to take down a few more of the masked figures before he began being seriously targeted.

When a stray curse caught a Death Eater who happened to run in front of him, Bill squat behind a hedge to catch his breath and get his bearings.

Looking about for Remus, Bill froze when he saw another group of masked Death Eaters Apparate in and start attacking. He squinted when a tall, red-eyed figure seemed to be in the center of the group.

“Wow, this could be it,” he breathed. They had evidently stumbled upon a major battle if the Dark Lord was there.

“Incarcerous!” Bill started as a familiar voice from his nightmares bellowed, and with horror, he spotted Remus being captured, his arms and legs bound by rope.

Fenrir, an obscene look of cruel pleasure on his face, was standing over him. “You took my pet,” Bill heard him say. “I’ll make you pay...”

Bill was half standing when he heard another scream. He looked up just in time to see one of the masked figures drop his mask and point his wand at the Dark Lord.

“What the...?”

Harry, his face white beneath the mask, was intoning what appeared to be a fairly complicated spell, while a taller figure... Bill blinked. Was that SNAPE? Yes, it was. Snape parried hexes, fiercely protecting Harry long enough to allow him to finish his spell with a bellowed Killing Curse.

With an inhuman cry, the creature who had caused all the problems collapsed in on itself, and the Death Eaters let out a collective moan.

Harry collapsed into Snape’s arms, and a Shield Spell went up around them.

Bill smiled as Ron and Draco fought in tandem, giving a good account of themselves. In fact, Weasleys were all over the place, battling quite bravely.

The Aurors rallied and seemed to be winning as the Death Eaters retreated, demoralized by the apparent death of their leader. Not Fenrir, though.

Bill crept forward, hoping to somehow surprise Fenrir and perhaps rescue his... Remus, but he was thwarted.

“I can smell you, pet,” Fenrir said, spinning to face the direction Bill was coming from. “Your fear is like nectar to me. Luscious.”

“You won’t win,” Bill said, advancing slowly, wand pointing at Fenrir. “Your master is dead, and so are you.”

Fenrir laughed. “I am my own master,” he said. Stooping, he pulled the now trussed Remus against him, nuzzling his neck as his eyes held Bill’s. Remus’ eyes closed in revulsion.

“You think you can get to me before I deprive you of your lover?” Fenrir asked, his growling voice setting Bill’s nerves on edge.

“Let him go,” Bill said evenly. In his mind he was screaming, however.

Not Remus, not Remus notRemusnotRemus...

Fenrir snarled, dragging a sharp nail over Remus’ cheek, tearing a thin line in the skin. “Make me,” he whispered menacingly.

Remus’ eyes caught Bill’s, and Bill could see him wordlessly urging him back, to not get too close. Bill growled. He would not allow this. “All right.”

With a shouted Finite, Bill launched himself at Fenrir.

~

Remus cursed as he was captured.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, he railed at himself silently as Fenrir baited Bill, and Bill fell into the trap.

Get away! he screamed silently, but Bill clearly wasn’t listening as he continued advancing, seeming determined to face his fear.

Don’t you dare...

Remus’ limbs were freed, both the ropes and the Immobilization Spell having been released by Bill’s screamed Finite. He twisted in an attempt to intercept Fenrir’s own jump towards Bill, but he was too late.

The two figures collided and rolled, snapping and snarling as they fought for supremacy. Remus searched frantically for his wand even as Fenrir seemed to be winning, but once he found it, he looked up again to see Bill pounding away at Fenrir’s face.

“You will not hurt him. You will not...” Bill was screaming.

“Remus? What’s going on...? Bill?”

Remus looked over into Harry’s tired yet triumphant face. “I think he needs to do this,” he said, stepping back.

“Perhaps we should prevent Mr. Weasley from beating that creature to a bloody pulp with his bare hands, however,” Snape observed dryly.

Remus raised an eyebrow as Harry settled back into Snape’s steady arms, pleased that they had finally acknowledged the attraction that had been so obvious to everyone else.

Remus let Bill continue for a few more moments, until, with a sigh, he finally reached forward and grabbed Bill’s shoulders when Fenrir stopped moving in between punches.

“Bill. It’s over. You got him,” he murmured as Bill continued trying to hit the already quite bloodied werewolf.

Bill blinked as if coming out of a haze. His hands began to shake and he pulled back in horror when he saw what he’d done.

“Oh, Merlin, what have I...?”

Remus pulled Bill close, murmuring to him as several Aurors came forward to collect Fenrir’s unresisting body.

“I’m as bad as he is.”

Remus shook his head. “No, never. You defended me, and yes, you got some revenge, but you didn’t torture him, however, you stopped him from torturing others.”

Bill looked up at him. “He can’t be allowed to do what he did to me to anyone else.”

Remus nodded, his eyes meeting Harry’s. “We’ll make sure of it, won’t we?” he said.

Harry nodded. “Yes,” he said. “I will.”

~

Bill smiled but refused as his mother offered him some more tea. Settling deeper into Remus’ arms, he watched with amusement as his twin brothers teased Draco Malfoy within an inch of his life.

Ron watched as well, smiling and rolling his eyes at their more ridiculous assertions. For his part, Draco actually took it all in stride, giving as good as he got, and when, in about ten minutes, he and Ron were wiping the floor with Fred and George in a game of wizard cribbage, Bill was almost convulsing with laughter.

The Burrow appeared to be party central for the end of the war celebrations.

It was two months since that fateful night when Harry had fulfilled his destiny, and the Ministry had declared it a wizard holiday.

Fenrir had survived Bill’s attack on him, and had been sentenced to Azkaban. Word had come only a week after his incarceration there that he’d been killed by some of the other inmates, and Bill hadn’t been able to dredge up anything but pity for him.

It was late in the evening, and everyone had passed through the Burrow at some point that day, even Percy, accompanied by Marcus Flint and Oliver Wood, both professional Quidditch players and undercover Order members, had been there. Bill thought he recognized the looks in their eyes and knew he would have to have a chat with more of his brothers.

When Harry and Snape, the celebrities of the hour, had stopped by, everyone had congratulated them, and they’d smiled, well, Harry had anyway, and left early. Bill snickered to himself as he recalled how they had looked at each other. He imagined there would be some announcement about them soon if Harry had anything to say about it.

Who knew there were so many shirt lifters about?

“You all right?” Remus whispered.

Bill nodded. “Perfect,” he said.

Remus had proven to be a very patient lover, showing Bill all the joys of lovemaking and never ever pushing him beyond when he could handle. The past few weeks had been the happiest of Bill’s life.

“Not tired?”

Bill smiled and leaned back. “Not a chance. In fact... I think it’s time that you show me the joys of bottoming tonight.”

Remus froze for a moment, then sighed softly and nuzzled his neck. “Think you’re really ready?” he asked.

Bill closed his eyes and thought of how his life had changed, and how, for the first time, he didn’t automatically see Fenrir leering at him, or Fleur’s pleading face when he dreamed. Now all he felt was happiness in his growing feelings for Remus. He couldn’t wait to tell him how much he loved him, although he suspected Remus knew.

“Yes,” he said. “I’m ready.”

They said their goodbyes and Apparated home, and as Remus made tender love to Bill, topping for the first time, he felt no pain, only pleasure and joy and love.

As they lay wrapped around each other afterwards, Bill’s breathing returning to normal, Remus asked, “So, how was it? Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

Bill nuzzled Remus’ neck. “It was wonderful,” he whispered. “You’re wonderful. I... I love you.”

Remus went still, and Bill felt a frisson of fear. “You... what did you say?”

Bill rolled onto his back to look up at him. “I love you,” he said softly but clearly. “You were right. Love makes all the difference.”

Remus let out a deep breath he hadn’t been aware of holding. “I love you, so much, Bill. I just wasn’t sure that you were ready to hear it.”

Bill, giddy, pulled Remus’ head down to his and kissed him deeply.

“I might not have been ready before, but I am now,” he said.

~Fin